Say someone's good at something (上手・下手・得意・苦手)

The Skill Quartet: The Four Words for Ability

To talk about skills in Japanese, you need to understand the four-quadrant matrix of skill and comfort:

• Objective skill / Praising OTHERS:
• 上手(じょうず) (skilful): Good at something.
• 下手(へた) (unskilful): Clumsy or poor at something.
• Subjective confidence / Talking about YOURSELF:
• 得意(とくい) (forte): Confident in, good at, your strong suit.
• 苦手(にがて) (struggle with): Poor at, uncomfortable with, not your cup of tea.

All four of these words are な-adjectives, and all four mark the target skill with the subject particle が, never を:

• マリアさんは歌が上手です: “Maria is good at singing.”
• 兄は絵が下手です: “My older brother is bad at drawing.”
• 私は料理が得意です: “I'm good at cooking” (Literally: “Cooking is my forte”).
• 私は数学が苦手です: “I struggle with math.”

The Japanese Modesty Barrier: Never Call Yourself 上手

In Japanese culture, humility (kenjou) is a core social virtue. Calling yourself 上手 (私は日本語が上手です) sounds extraordinarily boastful and arrogant—like declaring “I am a master craftsman!”.

• When praising OTHERS: Use 上手 (日本語がお上手ですね: “Your Japanese is so good!”).
• When talking about YOURSELF: Use 得意 (料理が得意です: “Cooking is my strong suit”) or simply state capability with できます (少しできます: “I can do a little”).
• When self-deprecating: If you are clumsy or bad at something, use 苦手 (泳ぐのが苦手です: “Swimming isn't my thing”). Avoid calling others 下手 to their face, as it is deeply insulting!

How to Respond to “日本語が上手ですね”

Every Japanese learner will be told 日本語が上手ですね！ (“Your Japanese is so good!”).

Accepting the compliment with “Yes, thank you” can feel uncomfortably blunt in Japanese etiquette. Instead, native speakers gracefully deflect the compliment with modesty:

• The Gold Standard Deflection: まだまだです: “I still have a long way to go.”
• Humble Refusal: いいえ、全然下手です: “No, not at all, I'm still really bad at it.”
• Gratitude with Humility: ありがとうございます、でもまだまだ勉強中です: “Thank you, but I'm still very much learning.”